Friday, July 3, 2009

A Walk In the Park

For such a long time I have not known how to deal productively with the raw emotions that have overtaken and plagued my mind. Instead of expressing them in a positive manner, I’ve internalized and repressed them. It’s easy to do when you are faced daily with all of the unknowns and the uncertainties that occur from living with my husband’s Cirrhosis. This disease is something I will never understand.

I genuinely want to change these negative feelings and be able to vent to get them out in ways other than tears. I realize this isn’t healthy, and its taking its toll on me emotionally. I know that something has to change, I can’t continue like this. Perhaps this is why I’ve not even had the heart to blog.

It’s been an especially difficult week physically and emotionally for both of us. I have spent numerous hours in prayer seeking God's guidance.

I am grateful that today we’ve turned a corner and have been able to get out of the house, and have some fun together. Escaping the sadness and trying to temporally forget about Eric's illness was exactly what the doctor ordered.

Eric and I went out to lunch at our favorite Mexican restaurant, and spent some quality time adventuring around the park overlooking the waterfront and sightseeing. The weather was perfect as the sun was shining and a cool breeze was blowing as the sailboats sailed smoothly down the river. The view was extraordinary and relaxing.

I’m looking forward to tomorrow and the adventures in our lives it will bring.

The Ben Franklin Bridge in Philadelphia is beautiful at night time.


  1. All your photos are beautiful. I don't know what you are referring to, but I hope it will become more bearable in the future.

  2. Life is precious, and is meant to be lived to the fullest day by day. As I often say, no one knows how many grains of sand are left in our personal hourglass.

    When our Father calls us, we must go. Until then, I say, raise a little hell!

  3. It's definitely important to get outside your own head as often as possible.

    The niggles of fear can quickly grow into torrents of terror. Irrational thoughts gain credibility and can grow to monstrous proportions inside the dank, dark corridors of the mind. But bring them out into the bright sunlight of social engagement and they are exposed as the whispy ghosts they are.

    Good luck with your journey. :-)

  4. Debi, I'm glad that you got out and focused on all the beauty around you. It really helps I think. Doing something other than focusing on the problems in my life helps me immensely.

  5. “Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.”

    I know that you're dealing with more than your fair share of weighty problems. It sounds though, as if you and Eric are creating some wonderful memories. Whether we have ten days or ten decades, isn't that how we should spend each and every day?

    Much love and huge (((HUGS))) to you, Debi!